Monday May 8th

Well it is another Monday morning - today I weighted 229lbs on my own scale.

Sunday was another good day. Didn't get out for the walk, but I did have a good food day, and only a few moments of cravings - this time just before I went to bed. So I moved upstairs in the bedroom as far as I could get away from the fridge!

I am pleased how fast this first initial weight is coming off. I'm practiced though - I know it will level off eventually. It's not healthy to loose weight too fast - that's when it comes back on again quickly. The body reacts to the fast weight loss by storing energy more efficiently - it takes us back to "cave man" days where we would biologically be without food for a long period of time (time of scarcity) then there would be a time of abundance. Our bodies would learn to conserve energy during time of scarcity (dieting) then put the pounds back on us during time of abundance (one extra carrot!).

I've been through this so many times - "been there, done that" - so I'm ready for the changes, the slow downs. But right now I'm very happy things are getting kicked off to a great start!

As this is an addiction for me - I have to remember that I'm doing a life style change.

It is interesting I"ve been talking with people who have similar feelings around food that I do. Those of us who use food as addiction have similar patterns. As a Child I would tear the house apart looking for food - I would eat anything- bakers chocolate, cookies, bread, crackers - my Mom would hid food from me and I would search every corner of the house until I found it. Even as an adult, if food is "hidden" from me - I will go searching for it - and get upset if I can't find the Halloween candy as I 'Need it now". I've even thrown food into the garbage can - (lets say a chocolate bar) and if the garbage seem clean enough and I can't handle the addictive cravings, I have rummaged through the garbage and retrieved the item to eat. That's how I know it's an addiction - beyond emotional eating.

Others don't have that type of behaviour - and don't really understand that part of addictive eating. I've talked to many emotional eaters (those who eat purely out of their emotions) and it is a different pattern - many of them where thin as children and adolecence - I was not thin as a child - I don't remember "thin" as being "me". The last time I showed up as thin in a picture I was 7 years old (grade 3) - By the end of grade 3 (Spring 1976 - I was 8 years old) I was starting to get "chubby".

Namaste

B.